Between the years of nineteen-eighty to nineteen-ninety, some of the manliest movies of all time were released to the public. Manly men showed manly emotions and manly feats of manliness to carve out their legend into the hall of manliness for all mankind. Look at this article and be amazed by the manliness herein.
And here we have it the penultimate conclusion to the manly movies series. The 1990 Steven Seagal epic, Hard to Kill. This movie is possibly the perfect cap off for a decade of manly movies. We have heroes waking up from comas, his beautiful nurse, the bad guy still running free, and the ultimate recovery montage.
However, despite the epicenes of this movie, Seagal’s character and acting throughout the film almost steers us into the parody off-ramp. The plot is basically this, a former DEA agent turned cop, does a major bust, preps to retire. Bad guys find out where he lives. Spouse is killed (this was 1990, we need an insta-revenge motive). He gets hurt, falls into a coma. Years pass, he wakes up, trains to avenge his loved ones, falls for his nurse. He then unleashes aikido, firearms, and smarminess upon villains who wronged him. You know, a typical Seagal movie.
Chock full of Steven Seagal’s patented version of insane fight scenes, and Seagal’s constant squint, this is definitely a manly movie of manliness. His character has the incredibly manly name of Mason Storm. Who himself is a beacon of manliness.
His then-wife, Kelly LeBrock plays Andrea “Andy” Stewart, a nurse who assists and falls for Stor, who just happens to be house sitting at an isolated ranch for a friend. Gotta love Hollywood.
William Sadler plays the main bad guy manipulating the action, a high-level senator by the name of Vernon Trent. That name just implies evil, right?
Frederick Coffin as Lieutenant Kevin O’Malley is the next big name in the main ensemble cast. He’s one of those guys you know his face, if not his name. You know, this guy:
Unlike some previous films, there are some attempts at romantic interludes, and his character is portrayed as the involved father type. But, because of his “unique” acting ability, it doesn’t sell as well as you might think it does.
Manly movie action sequence-Mason Storm has just made his ultimate drug bust in a manly manner, and whilst picking up a bottle of wine, winds up in the middle of a holdup. And as one does in these kinds of films, dispatches the armed miscreants with a sneer, some sarcasm, and aikido.
Manly stare and glare action- After the fight in the convenience store, Mason Storm jams on his way home. Being played by Seagal however, everywhere he looks or bops to, he maintains a glare of manliness unknown to most men.
Manly love moment for manly hero-After weeks, or hours, or whatever of rehab and training, Andy wears a sexy outfit and brings Mason a rose. And with nary a shower to stop him, Mason Storm shows his appreciation in a manly fashion.
Manly moment of sensitivity-Before the bad guys come to dispatch him, Mason Storm, who is implied to be a Catholic, puts his son to bed, and says good night prayers with him. The kid is taken in by Storm’s old boss
Manly moment of manliness-The most manly montage of all time. We get martial arts, Seagal’s weird jogging, weights, board breaks, and him glaring from the top of a mountain. We are not worthy of this scene of epic mainliness.
Manly epic moment of conclusion-Mason Storm hears the voice of the evil Senator, and declares his righteous vengeance in the only way he can:
Manliness on a scale of Jean Claude VanDamme (Kickboxer) to Sho Kosugi (Revenge Of The Ninja)-Since this leaned toward some shoehorned in sensitivity and way too much manliness, gonna have to give this one three out of four VanDamme’s
