Between the years of nineteen-eighty to nineteen-ninety, some of the manliest movies of all time were released to the public. Manly men showed manly emotions and manly feats of manliness to carve out their legend into the hall of manliness for all mankind. Look onto this article and be amazed by the manliness herein.
I am not sure how much more manliness is to be packed into this article, because we are looking at Lone Wolf McQuade, starring the paragon of manliness, you know the one, (he doesn’t do push-ups, he pushes the world down), Chuck Norris.
Pre-Walker days, Chuck Norris starred in this southwest-themed actioner with David “Caine-No-More” Carradine, as the villain; Barbara Carrera as the love interest; and Robert Beltran as Kayo, McQuade’s loyal partner and sort of sidekick.
As this is a Chuck Norris film, it was hard to nail down specific moments of manliness, but somehow we were able to see past the indestructible beard and narrow it down.
Manly movie action sequence- Chuck Norris versus some horse thievin’, no good varmints, that happen to have Uzi’s. Gotta love the 80’s.
Manly stare and glare action- Before whooping the rustlers, McQuade, snipes the bad guys. He uses a scope which is funny, because Chuck Norris could snipe Atom Ant in the fog, with a Daisy air rifle from from twenty miles away, blindfolded. I guess he had to make the movie more realistic.
Manly love moment for manly hero- Chuck Norris was not exactly Mister Sensitive here. (Oh, no, a Chuck Norris character has faults, the world is ended.) But, his sort of girlfriend cleans up his apartment and put healthy food in the fridge, not knowing he lives on beer, burgers, the tears of his enemies and insurance providers.
Manly moment of sensitivity- While at a party given by Carradine’s bad guy, that includes a ring of martial arts manliness, Walker, I mean McQuade’s partner gets assaulted by the bad guy’s posse. Chuck of course unleashes some Norris-FU upon the baddies and almost goes heads up with Carradine. (he seems to find this as pleasurable as hanging out with the love interest, the beautiful Barbara Carrera The love interest, of course, steps in, and after intervening and apologizing for her ‘friends’ behavior, Lone Wolf McNorris, responds in a very sensitive manner. But, not really.
Manly moment of manliness-When Kayo, young eager, DPS trooper, goes to wake up McQuade, he is ran out of the Ranger’s house by a gunshot through the ceiling and McQuade’s pet wolf. (I guess that is where the nickname comes from.) Then in the manliest manner possible by man, he practices his shooting, with a couple of different guns, WITHOUT A SHIRT!! Manly moment, indeed.
Manly epic moment of conclusion- In the inevitable fight between our two heavy hitters, Chuck unleashes a Norris-Fu spin kick, and as we all know, no matter how much longer the fight lasts once a Chuck Norris kick is released, time, space, and probability are ripped asunder.
Manliness on a scale of Jean Claude VanDamme (Kickboxer) to Sho Kosugi (Revenge Of The Ninja)- Probably two out of three VanDamme’s here due to his rudeness towards the lady person.
However:
