Between the years of nineteen-eighty to nineteen-ninety, some of the manliest movies of all time were released to the public. Manly men showed manly emotions and manly feats of manliness to carve out their legend into the hall of manliness for all mankind. Look at this article and be amazed by the manliness herein.
In 1987, Malone starring Burt Reynolds was released. Co-starring Lauren Hutton as Jamie, his handler and sort-of girlfriend, and Cliff Robertson as evil land grabbing, possible Neo-Nazi, Charles Delaney, this is almost Shane 2.0.
Reynolds plays Richard Malone, a disillusioned government assassin who has not completed his last two assignments due to, um, manly feelings like despondency and stuff. So, he basically walks away from the CIA-like agency he works for and takes to wandering. While near a small town, his car breaks down, and at the auto shop he gets to, he is taken in and works off his debt by helping around the shop. Along the way, the mechanic, Paul Barlow played by Scott Wilson, becomes his friend, and his college-age daughter, Jo, played by Cynthia Gibb, takes a shine to our world-weary hero.
Enter stage left, henchmen for Delaney are pushing for the auto shop owner to sell and move away. Most of the town has given in, and the evil underlings find evil ways to amuse themselves. These events cause our hero, Malone, to get involved, and use his unique skills to deal harshly with the bad guys.
In a subplot, Jamie is assigned to kill him because, he knows too much, and due to a weird series of 80’s action movie coincidences, winds up saving Malone, and nursing him back to health after being shot by some of Delaney’s hoods, and dealing with the atypical smarmy/crooked cops led by Sheriff Hawkins played by the man also known as Baron Harkonnen in David Finch’s Dune.
Of course, one-man impossible combat sequences, gunfights, and, explosions soon follow. And the ending you saw coming forty -five minutes into the movie, well maybe twenty-five, creeps its way to the front. Although filled with enough bloody violence and language to earn its R-rating, the videography and direction make it feel like a made for Showtime/HBO/Cinemax kind of film. When Reynolds made this film, he had already had several underperforming movies he was trying to escape from, and although this is a good popcorn action flick, it wasn’t enough to make the big turnaround he wanted. He plays the character quite well and fits with its premise, too bad the rest of the film isn’t as well-executed and should have been sanctioned by Hollywood agencies. (Secret assassin puns, see what I did there?)
Manly movie action sequence-After two of the bad guy’s underlings have come to kill Malone, he pulls a shotgun, and dispatches the miscreants with almost no 80’s style action hero yelling, and after taking a bullet.
Manly stare and glare action-In the movie’s opening, Malone (1987) tries to pull the trigger on a target, but can’t. He stares over the rifle at the man in question, while preparing to leave. The whole time giving the Burt Reynolds glare as only he can give.
Manly love moment for the manly hero-While he is recuperating with help from his handler, they share some romantic time together, all the while wondering who will end up dead.
Manly moment of sensitivity-When Malone (1987) is leaving for what he feels will be the final confrontation with Delaney, he parts ways with Jo. It’s this part of the film that gave us this exchange: Jo-“In five years I’ll be older.” Malone-“So will I.”
Manly moment of manliness-Walking Jo home, because he is seeing how crazy his layover is, Malone goes heads up with an oversized henchman and gives him what for. Who knew Burt could do Kung Fu?
Manly epic moment of conclusion-In one of the best walk away from an explosion after watching the explosion scenes in history, Malone (1987) shows how cool it is to walk away from an explosion if you really are Burt Reynolds.
Manliness on the scale of Jean Claude VanDamme (Kickboxer) to Sho Kosugi (Revenge Of The Ninja)-
Due to him being an assassin and showing loads of manly sensitivity, we give Malone three out of four Kosugi’s.
And before we forget, here’s a bonus gif from the movie, in where a cat is used as a distraction, only Burt Reynolds could pull this off without being in the scene.
